


Toxic

by orphan_account



Category: Gossip Girl (TV 2007)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:15:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,069
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24081178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Damien/EricSick of being used by Damien, Eric let's it slip that he used to have feelings for him. Damien is surprised and realises that he might also feel something for the young Van Der Woodsen. But is it too late for redemption?Happens after S04E14
Relationships: Damien Dalgaard/Eric van der Woodsen
Kudos: 16





	Toxic

**Author's Note:**

> A friend of mine who's a sap for happy endings asked for this. Starts the same as my other fic "Bad decisions" but changes halfway through.

Eric sat down on the bench, waiting. He looked around. No sign of him. He realised that he might not even show up. He pulled out his phone and checked his last texts to Damien.  
  
 _08:42AM_  
  
 _E: You don't get to just walk away after what you did to me._  
  
 _E: Corner of Holly Drive and 42nd Street. 10 o'clock sharp._  
  
 _D: Fine._  
  
Eric didn't even know what he was gonna say when he showed up. He was just so mad about what Damien did. He trusted him. He... cared about him. But it was all just a game.  
  
"Hey."  
  
Eric turned. He saw Damien. He just stood there, hands in his jacket pockets. Just looking at his face made him furious. Damien took a couple steps and sat down next to him.  
  
"What did you call me here for?" Damien asked.  
  
Eric stayed quiet. There was so much he wanted to say. To let Damien how much he had fucked him up. But... the words didn't come out. Damien turned, looking him directly in the face.  
  
"I said, what did you call me for?"  
  
More silence. He didn't even look Damien in the face. Because then he'd have to face everything Damien had meant to him over these last few weeks.  
  
"Alright, that's it, I'm out of here," Damien said. He got up and started walking. ' _Last chance_ ' Eric thought. And he said the only thing he could think up.  
  
"Why?" he asked. Damien stopped. Then he looked back at Eric.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Why me?" Eric said. "Why did have to pretend to care?"  
  
"I already told you why. To get to Ben."  
  
That wasn't enough for Eric. He needed more. Some sort of confirmation that whatever they had... mattered.  
  
"I just wanna know. Did you ever actually care? Everything I told you, all the time we spent together, were you just using me the whole time?"  
  
Now it was Damien's turn to stay silent. He looked to the side, at his shoes, everywhere except Eric. That just made Eric more mad. He got up and looked Damien right in the face. That, all the feelings from last night came rushing back. The feeling of stupidity when Damien told him the truth. The shatter in his chest when he walked away. All the tears that streamed down his face when he tried to go sleep.  
  
"Look, you're a nice kid, Eric, but--"  
  
"No," Eric interrupted, rage building inside him. "Don't patronise me like I'm some child. Don't you get it? I was at my lowest and I thought you were there for me. I cared about you. I fucking loved you! But... you're not worth it. I know that now. Goodbye, Damien."  
  
Eric tried to walked past Damien but he grabbed his arm.  
  
"Eric, wait."  
  
"Don't touch me!" he shouted, yanking his arm away. "I never want to see you again."  
  
Eric turned and walked away. Damien just stood there. It took him a minute to process everything Eric had said.  
  
"I fucking loved you."  
  
His own father had never even said those words to him. In fact, now that he thought about it, no one had. Love hadn't mattered to him. It wasn't part of who he was. But... Eric actually loved him. And he just used him. He didn't know what he had expected when he first encountered Eric but it wasn't this. But then, as he started walking back to his hotel, he realised he wanted to fix things. He wanted Eric to care. He needed him to. He didn't want to go back to having no one.  
  
 **THE NEXT DAY**  
  
 _11:52AM_  
  
 _D: I know what I did was wrong. I want to fix this._  
  
 _E: Too late._  
  
 _D: Just give me a chance._  
  
 _12:03AM_  
  
 _D: Fine, I'm coming over._  
  
Damien stepped out of the elevator into the Van Der Woodsen's apartment. When he turned the corner, he saw Eric, sitting on the couch, waiting.  
  
"Oh my God, you were serious. Get out!" Eric immediately shouted at him.  
  
"Not until you hear me out."  
  
"My parents will kill you if they catch you here."  
  
"I don't care," Damien said without hesitation. "I'm not leaving until you hear what I have to say."

Eric sighed and crossed his arms. He didn't want to listen to him any longer but it looked like he didn't have much of a choice. When Damien got no answer he continued talking.  
  
"Look, I know what I did to you and your family was messed up. I guess I've never cared about who I hurt before because no one cared about me. Or, at least, I thought no one did."  
  
Eric remained silent, impatiently waiting for him to finish.  
  
"It's just that... when you told me that you love me I--"  
  
"Loved," Eric corrected.  
  
"Right. But you, Eric, you're so pure and kind. You saw good in me when I didn't believe there was."  
  
Damien's heart was beating faster and faster with each passing second. He felt fear creeping through his body; a fear of rejection, something he hadn't felt in a while.  
  
"Please say something."  
  
"I don't know what you want me to say."  
  
Damien reached out and took his hand.   
  
"Say that you'll give me - no, us - a shot."  
  
"What do you mean?" Eric asked, actually scared with where this was going.  
  
"For fuck's sake, Eric, I love you. I want you. I need you. And I'll do whatever it takes to prove to your family, myself and most importantly, you, that I can change."  
  
Eric felt his heart and his head pulling him in opposite directions. All logic said to say no and forget Damien's existence. But his heart... his heart yearned for Damien. But when he looked in his eyes, he knew what choice he would make.  
  
Eric leaned in, giving Damien a soft kiss. At first he was frozen still but then he pulled Eric in closer by his hips, slowly losing himself in the other boy's lips. Eric pulled away before they pushed their luck and someone caught them.  
  
"Damien, you get one last chance. Don't screw it up because... for some stupid reason, I still love you."  
  
"Don't worry about it, babe," said Damien, planting a small kiss on Eric's hand. "I'm in this for the long run."  
  
And for the first time in a while, Eric genuinely smiled.


End file.
